You and your roommate must discuss how to handle overnight guests. You could decide that the room is just for the two of you and sleepovers are not OK except when one roommate is away -- and even then with permission. If you don't want someone else sleeping in your bed, you can agree that guests must bunk on the floor.
This option may seem extreme, but keep one thing in mind: Knowledge and permission should be at the heart of any rule about sleepovers in your room. If both roommates think it's OK to have the occasional sibling or friend from another college spend a night, then it's fine, with a little warning. You may set limits on how many nights a guest can stay.
A much thornier question arises over having meet-ups or sleepovers with people with whom you have an intimate physical relationship. Before this kind of situation comes up, you and your roommate should have a serious talk about what's OK. Would you be comfortable trying to sleep in your bed if two people were romantically involved in the other bed, or would you prefer to leave the room? Discuss the possibilities. Is it never OK to use the dorm room for a date? Is it OK only with advance notice? Do you want to agree on some sign or signal in case of last-minute developments, or must there be permission ahead of time? Do you want limits on how often one roommate can have a guest? After all, you want to be able to sleep in your own room most of the time.
It may be awkward even to talk about such a rule with someone you haven't known long, but a little awkwardness is better than major embarrassment.
Possible embarrassment leads us to a really important rule. Keep reading to learn more.